The Joey Factory

I thought after my last post, we’d lighten things up a bit. I will, however start with, yes I met my biological mother, and it wasn’t a traumatic experience. It’s cool to have met her, and we’ll see where we go from here. And now on to videos…

And now I must finish reading this book, I’ve got less than 100 pages!

p.s. Have you seen my new coat? I bought it at Target. No sightings of Target Boy. Did I make him disappear? I hope so, lol! It’s not completely identical, but if you want identical you’ll be paying shit loads of money on eBay!

IF YOU LIKED THIS BLOG, FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER Joey Broyles.

Read full story @ Yahoo!: Perez Hilton sues Black Eyed Peas manager

Perez Hilton should be punched again! He may have the right to sue Polo Molina for kicking his ass, but the fucking media is reporting in his defense. Oh my fucking god! This douche-monger’s lawyer had this to say, “Whether you love Perez or hate him, he is entitled to his freedom of speech without fear of physical violence. This lawsuit will make the statement that violence is never the answer.”

This lawsuit does make a statement, that Perez Hilton is a fucking hypocrite. He is a homosexual, first and foremost, and wants to be accepted and have equal rights like the rest of us, right? Well he has taken all that we’ve accomplished as a gay community and has sent us back several years. He wants us gays to be able to walk down the street and be treated like everyone else, yet he called will.i.am a ‘faggot.” This story may sell and preach ‘violence is never the answer’ but as far as I’m concerned he is a fucking joke. And when somebody throws a punch at him or screams out ‘faggot’ he will undoubtedly deserve every little bit of it.

Perez Hilton may be a hero in many people’s eyes, but Mario Lavandeira is a scared little white boy. When will.i.am came up to him and said ‘You need to respect me.’ Who cares if it was about Perez’s blog, the fact is Perez does not respect anyone. And when Perez mentioned that will.i.am ‘…was obviously trying to intimidate me and scare me.” I find that to be a bunch of bullshit, it sounds more like Perez was scared of a strong black man and then proceeded to stereotype will.i.am. Perez’s response, “I don’t respect you and I did say this, and I knew that it would be the worst thing I could possibly say to him because he was acting the way he was. I said ‘You know what, I don’t respect you and you’re gay and stop being such a faggot.’” He knew what he was doing and will.i.am should find a way to sue the little bitch for slander or defamation of character.

In defense of Mr. Molina I think he did the right thing to the wrong person. Perez is known for his big fucking mouth and making everything larger than life. But first off, who goes on Twitter first to report they’ve been assaulted? Unless the police department happens to have a Twitter account. (Rolling my eyes.) Anyway back to Mr. Molina. Molina was defending will.i.am’s honor and I find that to be a great quality to have in both a manager and friend. Thank you Mr. Molina for punching Perez Hilton, someone should have done it a long time ago.

As for the rest of Hollywood, embrace whatever side you want, but know that I am on the Black Eyed Peas’ side. Violence may not be the answer but I don’t consider punching Perez Hilton violence, it’s more like an act of God. I’m sure to read several more stories about the violence overshadowing the actual issue at hand, Perez Hilton is a bigot.

Be sure to bookmark this blog, because coming mid July I’ve got a nice little song to go along with who I am and it also will depict a special night in Perez’s life! You won’t want to miss it!

JoeyBroyles.com

Fucking hilarious! Maybe I am very wrong for saying these things about my own “race” as it were, but I’m a special-hybrid-homosexual-mix to begin with. What the fuck was he thinking? So here’s the gist of the story from Yahoo! News:
TORONTO – Police have charged the tour manager of the Black Eyed Peas with assault after he allegedly punched celebrity blogger Perez Hilton outside a Toronto nightclub.

Hilton said he got into an argument with band members Fergie and will.i.am at the Cobra nightclub early Monday morning and was punched outside by Polo Molina, the band’s tour manager. They were at the club following a Sunday night video awards show.

Molina turned himself in and has been charged with assaulting Hilton, Toronto Police Constable Tony Vella said. Molina is due in court Aug. 5.

Hilton, whose real name is Mario Lavandeira, complained about the incident on the microblogging site Twitter. He tweeted at 4 a.m.: “I am bleeding. Please, I need to file a police report. No joke.”

Hilton, who is openly gay, said in interview with The Associated Press that he called will.i.am a “faggot,” a gay slur, inside the club after the musician told the blogger not to write about his band on his Web site.

“He was like ‘You need to respect me.’ He was in my face. He was obviously trying to intimidate me and scare me,” Hilton said. “I was like ‘I don’t need to respect you. I don’t respect you and I did say this, and I knew that it would be the worst thing I could possibly say to him because he was acting the way he was. I said ‘You know what, I don’t respect you and you’re gay and stop being such a faggot.’”

Will.i.am said in a video posting on dip.dive.com that he came to Hilton with respect and was called a “faggot.”

Hilton, who was at the club with Lady Gaga, said he then left the club and was punched from behind. The pop stars and the blogger were among celebrities in Toronto for the MuchMusic Video Awards on Sunday night.

A spokeswoman for the Black Eyed Peas declined comment.

He totally deserved the blow to the back of his head. He’s a little fucker who totally needs to get himself a bigger posse, because if you wanna talk shit, you better watch your back. Granted he may have freedom of speech, but if a man comes up to you and tries to talk with you, man to fag, you better listen. With will.i.am it’s all about respect and as popular as Perez Hilton thinks he is, you just can’t go spouting your mouth off like that. Calling a straight man a ‘faggot’ obviously didn’t help the situation because he got his ass handed to him.

Perez should heed this as a warning and not so much as an assault. It’s hardly an assault. If someone said that shit to me, there would be more than a blow to your head. Now I’m gonna make this clear: I don’t want the dude dead, but I can do it better and hotter than Perez Hilton. I may be no one today, but look for me tomorrow!

Bookmark my page or save the link because you’ll wanna see this:

In other news be sure to look for my music video mid July! Because we’re gonna poke some more funny at cutie-patootie Perez Hilton! Ha! Ha!

JoeyBroyles.com

Click to Watch The Shanikwa Shanikwa Show

Above is that video that Jamie and I worked on very hard so you better watch! It was a lot of fun to make and things are a lot more interesting when someone else is behind that camera, aside from the tripod.

So the past few days I’ve been creating a more professional look for my website and I think I’m finally content with it. I wouldn’t leave my computer for hours at a time and I felt very much like a zombie. Oh well, I survived. Take a look:

Please go to my page and send me some love. J17 PRODUCTIONS

So today was a rather fun day. I drove downtown to see my gurrl Krystal. She is a good old pal from the high school days and I think she’s the shit. She is a really good person, yet she’s got a wild side, and if you don’t have a wild side, get one. Cause you can’t compete with this gurrl right herre! LOL. No, she really is great.

Before I had lunch with Krystal, I went to visit Lnz at her lovely job. I was looking for some new hair product and shizz. I was glad she didn’t have a client, because as my hair grows longer, I need to learn how to style it. So I had her show me how to flat iron my hair the correct way. You see when I flat iron my hair, it does just that, it goes flat. You notice they don’t call it a straight iron.

It’s amazing the tricks a hair stylist can teach you. So if you want your hair to be more voluminous then here’s what you do:

First flat iron your hair the opposite way that it usually lays. For instance a majority of my hair lays to my left, so I flat iron towards the right and sort of flick my wrist. And there’s a little volume. To really encourage volume I do recommend the following products. First for frizzy hair may I suggest some sort of skinny serum that will defrizz that shit we call hair.

After you got that out of the way, let me tell you about this awesome product! It’s called Pure Abundance Hair Potion by Aveda. So it’s super cool, it’s a thickening agent and it never gets sticky. The cool things about it. At first it is a powder of some sorts. But when it contacts your skin it becomes some sort of lotion. So from potion powder to lotion! Super awesome. Love it. It gives you that second day look for your hair. Yay for grungy-dingy basement hair, lol. Voluminous or Volumness!

So after my fun downtown, with Lnz and Krystal, it was back to home. Where I ignored the apartment that desperately needs to be cleaned for Friday’s Twilight Movie Night! Instead of cleaning, I played with Skittles for a while. We call it laser kitty. Then I went to my computer with intentions to edit Shanikwa or edit my gallery page for my website. Instead I worked on an old melody that I made up in high school.

Originally the song was about how I was sorry for my father, not being able to save him from the stupid court systems. But I thought to myself that shit is so old. Those emotions are pretty much retired. My father and I are very close, once again, so it just wasn’t the same. Instead I wrote about a breakup of sorts, putting my two cents in on my own past pains. I came up with some awesome shit. Here’s a little part of it:
Sorry by Joey Broyles ©2009
It’s in it’s real rough form right now. I’m experimenting with lots of sounds, but the lyrics came pretty easy and I’m glad about that. I’ve had a really hard time composing songs. I can write lyrics till my fingers bleed. I can come up with some really awesome music, but I can never fuse the two together. Everything about this song fuses and I’m really excited about it. Yay!

Now this evening was an amazing night filled with 90210! Seriously I’m glad I stuck with that show because the actors and the writers have found their niche. And it’s really good. It brings back memories of the first 90210. Back when I was eight years old, back in the day. Silver is a crazy bitch, but it’s okay, because she’s bipolar now. WTF! Um I know bipolar and that was way out there. Trust me on this, trust me! But Silver is still one of my favorites fo sure!

I started the day at Cameo Day Spa & Salon where one of my best friend’s Lindsey(LNZ, as I will forever refer to her as) works. She styles or cuts my hair, whatever it is. We’ve been working on my look for awhile I’m trying to accomplish Chace Crawford‘s hair style(GOSSIP GIRL). I still have a long way to go, but I’ve got more hair now than I did last year. I’ll put a picture up and show you the status of my hair. I do love photo shoots with lots of eyeliner and a new t-shirt.

Downtown Madison is as close as to Chicago as we can get without going there. Madison has State Street and well you know what Chicago has. We went to a restaurant, that my friend Krystal G. and I had tried last week, Cosi. Pretty damn yummy stuff. Flat bread is delicious! She bought lunch because her boy toy owed her big time for never-you-mind! Then we had to part ways, it’s so sad when she has to go back to work. I guess it’s weird to have Tuesdays and Thursdays off, but that’s how it works in my job. Lnz and I use to have the same day off Tuesdays, so we’re always sad when she has to go to work.

Then I drove home to pet my cat and grab my phone, which I left in my bedroom. I always forget something when I’m in a hurry but usually it’s like a charger for the computer or phone, not my actual cell phone. Speaking of cell phones, I’ve been obsessing over the iPhone since it’s first generation release and all I want is that damn thing but I never can swing the price. I would definitely stop eating for a whole month for that thing! Someday I’ll get it. But now I hear there is another one coming out, possibly 32GB version with a 24 hour battery life. I think I can wait for that one and maybe by then AT&T will figure out their 3G Network issues. Anyway I need one.

Yes I’m completely aware of how materialistic I am! So fuck off to those of you who think we should be feeding all these people in other countries with our low income paychecks. How about you bitches who tell me I should go help the children in foreign countries realize: that us middle class people are having a hard time, just as others. If you’ve got the money go and pay for a whole meal for a starving child in (insert your poor country of the week here). Note I do not own the iPhone, so you can’t tell me I need to feed another hungry person. If I were rich and famous I’d have my own charities and make sure that a true 80% of all donations go to these children and their families personally.

I had to get that off my chest because one time some random asshole stumbled across one of my old blogs and chastised me for being a spoiled little American. Sorry you must have me confused with someone else because I have not been spoiled. You want spoiled look at the Hollywood children!

Now back to my day. I continued on to Star Cinema: IMAX where I picked up my WATCHMEN IMAX tickets. Very excited to see this movie, it looks fantastic! I really enjoy the glowing blue man and that girl who stands next to him at the climax of the trailer. Danny and I are going to the movie with our friends Monica, Cedric, Lnz, and Mario, so we’ll definitely have an amazing time!!! I have to preorder tickets when it comes to opening weekend because if I don’t there’s always that chance that the 10:20 PM showing on Saturday would be SOLD OUT! And as we all know that sucks so bad.

Onto Target! I have a super Target near my house and I love shopping there because it’s an upper class version of Wal-Mart. Don’t worry I’m a bastard and I’m also addicted to Wal-Mart too. So I walked in and went straight to the electronics center and stared at the movie Australia. I wanted this movie so damn bad because despite what critics said, it was fucking great. Oh well I didn’t buy it and for good reason. Next week I’ll be purchasing another flop movie called Howard The Duck along with Disney’s Pinocchio and if I can get away with it Kelly Clarkson’s new cd too.

So I picked up my gurrl, Jamie’s birthday present. It’s really amazing, but she’ll read this and then know what it is and sorry Jamie not til Friday! On my way out I had picked up the Lady GaGa CD because I can’t get her out of my head. Now mind you I hate her first single(Just Dance featuring Colby O’Donis) with a passion but I really enjoy every other song. Well I had two POP CDs and some other items and Chris The Probably Gay Cashier said, “Not into rock, huh?” Um excuse me where on Earth do you get off judging me by just two CDs? I’m going to rant now.

I’m an eclectic music boy who prides himself on just that. Ask anyone who knows me and they’ll probably say he has a very eclectic music collection. Let’s see as far as rock goes right now I’m very into The Kills, White Lies(UK Gods–throw back to the 80s), The Killers, OneRepublic, and Muse. And let’s define Rock as not Hard Rock, I’m speaking Rock! Anyway I pride myself in my musical taste because I’ve got a whole platter of genres and a lot of the shit you probably haven’t heard of before. I would like to take this moment and say, “Chris. I’m really glad you listened to Metallica on your lunch break. I listened to The Kills on my way to Target.” Such a fag. I think I’ll make him a mix and say, “Here. Broaden your horizons.”

I don’t know if it’s just me. But I really don’t like other gay boys other than my boyfriend and a small handful of friends. I hate the clubs, I hate the whole scene. I’m by no means a prude. I watch porn and all that jazz. But geez does everybody have to be, “OMG! I’m uber excited!” It’s just gross. There has to be a club I can join to ban against the Super Effeminate Homosexuals. They have to be put on their own planet for real. This does not include drag queens, transsexuals, or transgendered people. I’m only annoyed by this super effeminate race, if you will, of homos. It’s so hard not to go up and ask, “Hey man? What the fuck are you on?” Probably ecstasy.

That’s all I want to say today!